How to know whether your caregiver is a good match

Do you ever wonder whether the caregiver you have is the right fit for you and your family? If you have to wonder, odds are she probably is not. When you have the right caregiver it doesn’t take long at all to know it. On the flip side, when you have a poor match, it’s usually even more crystal clear, but often out of politeness, sympathy, desperation, or just wanting to give the relationship time to develop, we can live in a bit of denial, delaying the inevitable and paying the large price of our time, affection, and money in the meantime. If you encounter such a match, try hard to move on…in the end, it will save all parties involved unnecessary stress. 

Remember that the difference between a good match and a poor match is often the difference between complete bliss and pure stress. Bliss is the goal! And frankly, it’s the requirement as we pay our hard earned money for quality care for our families. 

Here are some signs that can indicate whether a caregiver is the right match for you and your family.

Good.  Your caregiver is in sync with your family.  She follows even your most vague instructions well, interpreting them and any implied or obvious needs accurately and wisely.

Poor.  Despite reminders about requirements, your caregiver doesn’t follow the instructions or carries out her own preferred method of doing things.


Good.  Your caregiver is punctual and reliable, and respects your schedule.

Poor.  Your caregiver is occasionally late,  misses work, or has excessive obligations that interference with her caregiving obligations.


Good:  Your caregiver regularly communicates the status of events, activities, issues, and responsibilities as well as any needs or concerns.

Poor: You often wonder the status of daily occurrences and have to draw the information out of the caregiver to find out, leading you to worry about how well your family is being cared for.


Good: You are confident and comfortable leaving your caregiver to perform her responsibilities.

Poor: You are uncomfortable and worry about leaving your caregiver to perform her responsibilities.


Good:  You feel like your caregiver does a stellar job of helping care for your family’s needs.

Poor: For whatever reasons, you feel like your caregiver does a poor job of performing her responsibilities.

You and your family are the gauge for what YOU need and know best whether someone fits WITH YOUR FAMILY or not.

What signs tell you whether your caregiver is a good match or not?

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7 thoughts on “How to know whether your caregiver is a good match

  1. GREAT article! Love the good vs. poor analogies. I think having a caregiver who is able to interpret your needs is crucial, especially because us busy parents don’t always have time to sit down and micromanage – I know I need someone who can just take a few instructions and run with it, without needing me to spell everything out for her all the time.

  2. In my opinion, it’s important to hire someone who’s ideals match up with yours, whether it’s religion, nutrition, activity levels, etc. It can make all the difference. And having someone whose ideals line up with yours makes it much easier to get the kids on a schedule that’s consistent with the one they follow when the parents are at home.

  3. I’ve definitely been in the situation before where I couldn’t pinpoint why exactly, but I just felt like my nanny wasn’t doing the best job. I was hesitant to let her go because I had already invested time and money into her, but in the end letting her go was the right decision. We couldn’t be happier with our new nanny, either, she’s just a much better fit.

  4. You nailed it saying that we sometimes live in denial! I don’t know why we do that, but I think its human nature. When you emphatically want something to work out, it’s hard to recognize and admit when it isn’t, even when it’s in the best interest for all parties involved.

  5. I think it’s easy to overlook the importance of having a nanny who is truly in sync with your family until you find the one who is. Once you do, you’ll never settle for less.

  6. Having a caregiver with stellar communication skills is an absolute must in my household. I can let certain things slide, but that is not one of them. I need to know I can count on her to openly talk to me about any problems that come up.

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