It’s never too early to foster a love of reading in your children. One of the most wonderful resources at your disposal when it comes to getting kids to read is located right in your neighborhood: your local library. When the mercury rises and classes end for the school year, these are ten of the reasons why you might want to start spending more time at your local library.

• You Want Your Kids to Love Books – Whether you’re a bookworm or not, there are few places in the world more suited to stimulating a love of reading and books than the library. Turning your little one loose in the children’s stacks or directing your middle schooler to the Young Adult section is a great way to help them experience the wonder and excitement of a good book.
• Story Hour! – Almost all libraries, from the grandest to the smallest village branch, will offer some sort of weekly or daily story hour for kids. These events are a great introduction to books for pre-readers, and can help to keep a love of stories flowing in kids that are honing their reading skills.
• Community Programs – You may not realize it, but there’s more to your local library than books and films. Many act as a sort of community hub by allowing postings for community events and by hosting relevant programs for kids and adults alike.
• You’re Financially Strapped – Raising kids is anything but cheap, which is why so many parents appreciate the programs in local libraries. Most are free or extremely low cost, and can help you to keep your kids occupied and learning throughout the summer without forcing you to pay day camp fees.
• Peace and Quiet – If there’s one thing that hasn’t changed with time, it’s that the library is a place where shouting and loud speech is frowned upon. When you’re raising children, peace and quiet is a very rare and precious commodity. At your local library, you’ll be able to soak it in for a while.
• Finding Rare and Out-of-Print Books – Introducing your children to a favorite book from your own childhood is a rewarding experience, but it’s not always easy when those books are relatively obscure or out of print. Rather than scouring online merchants to find a used copy of questionable quality at an outrageous price, check with your local library! If they don’t have a copy on hand, they may be able to locate one for you from another branch.
• Supporting a Fixture of Your Community – As eReaders and eBooks continue to become more popular, many local library branches are struggling to remain relevant. Because they are analog establishments in an increasingly digital world, libraries today need all of the support they can get. Socially-conscious parents that want to support an integral part of their communities can make a real difference in the life of a library simply by visiting.
• Age-Appropriate Entertainment – When you have kids that span a wide range of ages, finding entertainment that’s appropriate for the little ones without boring the older children can be a real challenge. Because your local library will have a variety of sections and caters to a wide range of interests, you’ll be able to keep everyone in the family happy with one trip.
• Fostering a Sense of Independence in Kids – Finding, checking out and accepting responsibility for their own books from the library helps kids take small but necessary steps on the road to independence.
• Beating the Summer Heat – As temperatures soar, finding affordable means of entertainment that will allow you to beat the heat often becomes a top priority. The air conditioned library will keep everyone cool while providing worthwhile, intellectually sound entertainment.

Look for bulletin boards at your local library to inform yourself of upcoming events, or inquire with the library staff about newsletters and email lists. You may be surprised when you realize just how many exciting things there are to do at your local branch!

Time outs are a common and accepted form of punishment today for parents and caregivers alike. As far as forms of punishment go, there are many compelling reasons to give your child a time out instead of resulting to other physical forms of punishment. Taking a time out can help your child calm down and be able to make better choices; however, the “time-out” is often overused and misused by parents.

Time-outs are not always the answer.  Most misbehavior a child exhibits are a sign of a bigger emotional problem.  If your child throws a temper-tantrum because he cannot play with the green car, there is a good chance his temper-tantrum is about much more than the car.  In order to discover what else could be bothering him, you need to sit and spend some time with him.  When you instantly send him out of the room away from you for getting upset, it does not help him to fix his problem.  In fact it usually makes his problem much worse.

Give your child a “time-in” instead.  Sending your child away from you will only work to make the underlying issue worse. Instead, have him sit next to you for a certain period of time.  This will serve two purposes.  First, it will help him to calm down and think more clearly, which is the ultimate goal of a “time-out.”  Second, it will reassure him that he will not be left alone to figure out how to act.  Third, it will give you a chance to discover what might be the underlying issue he is struggling with.  When possible, you should sit with your child during this time, but if you are unable to do that, having him in the same room to you or at the seat next to you can make a big difference.

Let the “time-in” be over when the child is ready.  Parents often set timers or select an appropriate time for the child to be punished.  Unfortunately, this often does not help him learn to ultimately control his behaviors.  Setting a time implies that at the end of the time, he should be acting “right,” but if there is an underlying issue at play, this will likely not be the case.  Instead, give your child the power to control when he is ready to re-enter play time.  Tell him that when he is ready to act, talk and play in a helpful or kind manner, he can return to his toys.  This gives your child the choice.  Perhaps he really needs some time away from other children or simply is craving some time next to you.  By giving him the control over when his time-in is over, you empower him to make his own choices.

Give yourself a time-out.  When your day has been long, you are exhausted and your child behaves in a less than desirable manner, it can be very difficult to remain calm.  This is when frustration and yelling occurs most often in the home.  Instead of sending your child away because you are frustrated, try walking away from the situation yourself.  Taking an adult time-out can help your child more than you might realize.  It models an appropriate way to handle anger and frustration.  It helps you to regain your composure so you can better address the issues your child is facing and it helps you to react to your child in the way you want to.

Though there certainly are times that it is in the child’s best interest to be sent into a time-out, most of the time the best discipline for a child is more time with you.  That is most likely what your child’s underlying need is to begin with.

By Marcia Hall

As parents, you are inherently busy.  There are a lot of details that go into raising children, not to mention the upkeep of a home and any other outside responsibilities you take on.  Add to that work outside the home and there may be days that you do not stop working, from sun-up to sun-down and beyond.  Here are a few tricks to help you find a few extra moments in your day.

Pay attention to how much time you spend on your computer in entertaining activities.  If you spend the majority of your time with your kids and not around other adults, websites like Facebook and Pinterest can be great ways to connect with others, as well as be a great way to get a little “you” time.  Be careful though, because it’s easy to quickly lose track of time on these sites.   Set a certain time everyday that you will check-in and check-out with the social media world, then set a timer.  This will help ensure that you don’t lose track of time and get sucked into the time warp that can be created.

Don’t neglect time with your kids.  This is often the quickest thing to be taken off the list, but it really is the most important thing to make sure stays on the list.  Individual time with your children is critical to their emotional development.  Just 15 minutes of your undivided attention each day can make a world of difference.   Parents often reason that the extra time that is saved is needed “just today,” but in reality neglecting this time with your child will cost you in the end.  When children get individual attention from a parent or caregiver they are less likely to act out with negative behaviors.  When you have children who act out less, you will find more time in your day.

Spend one hour at the beginning of the week planning out your week.  Sunday night is a great time to gather your to-do lists and activity calendars for the week and plan your agenda.  Certainly unexpected events are bound to come up, but when you start your week off with a plan of action, you are better able to address the emergency issues that inevitably arise.  By spending an hour at the beginning of the week planning your week you will be more likely to be on the same page with your parenting partner too, as it will give you the opportunity to coordinate schedules and expectations.

Divide larger jobs into smaller parts on your to-do list. Big jobs or tasks can seem overwhelming at first glance, but when you separate out the big jobs into smaller section they can seem much more manageable.  You can tackle one small task at a time, choosing to do part of it during naptime and part of it the next day.  The whole thing does not need to be accomplished all at once.

Divide to-dos into three categories.  By labeling things into duties taking under 15 minutes, duties taking under 30 minutes and duties taking over 30 minutes you can better assess how to approach tackling them.  That way when you are planning your week or when you suddenly find yourself with a little extra time on your hands, you can look at your to-do list and quickly find a task that can be done in the amount of time you have.

Don’t forget to take time to relax.  You may be able to run on all cylinders for a period of time, but eventually your energy level will drop.  Don’t feel guilty about taking time to rest and rejuvenate.  If this means that you take a nap with your kids every once in a while or go to bed early, do it.  If it means that you find a way to go out with friends now and then, make it happen.  Sometimes you will have to pull yourself away from the children and family you love so that you are able to be the best caregiver for them you can.

Caring for children is a non-stop job.  Many parents that stay home and care for their kids also have other jobs and responsibilities.  It can be hard to find time to do everything, but it is possible to get things done with children around.

Dehydration is a dangerous situation, and it’s also one that’s all too common when the weather heats up and kids flock to the great outdoors in sweaty, enthusiastic crowds. Making sure that your brood stays hydrated while the mercury rises doesn’t have to be a losing battle, though. These tips can help you ensure that everyone in the family is getting the hydration they need, even when they’re running wild through the dog days of summer.

Stick With Water, and Offer Plenty

Give your kids more water than you think they will need. They should be drinking regularly on warm summer days. Kids have a lot of energy, short attention spans, love to run around and may not stop themselves from having fun if they start to feel thirsty. Make sure you stop them so they can have plenty of water throughout the day. You’ll have to regulate their intake until your kids are old enough to realize they need to drink water on their own. Sticking with water also helps to eliminate any added sugars, dyes or artificial flavorings that are often present in sports drinks.

Don’t Wait Until They’re Thirsty

If you wait until your kids say they are thirsty, you may have waited too long. Thirst is one sign of dehydration. Keep kids from falling victim to dehydration by making sure that water is always available and easy to obtain, and by encouraging them to rest on a fairly regular basis.

Avoid Caffeinated Beverages

Caffeine-filled drinks, such as soda and energy drinks, increase the risks of dehydration. Keep it simple with water whenever possible, substituting the occasional sports drink as a treat for special days.

Embrace the Shade

Encourage your kids to take breaks in shady spots, and to get out of the sun often. Even the shade of wearing a hat is better than nothing. That small break from sunshine will keep your kids feeling happier and healthier. You’ll want to keep in mind, however, that dehydration does not rely solely on a sunny day. If there is extreme heat under any sky, keep your kids indoors for the day.

Eat Plenty of Popsicles

Your kids will love you if you tell them to eat as many popsicles as they can throughout the day. This simple, yet delicious treat will help keep your kids hydrated on those warm summer days. Have your kids take a break every hour or so while they sit and enjoy their popsicles. Either bring the kids inside to get them out of the sun, or encourage them to eat their treats under the shade of a tree. Consider a sugar-free version, though, as excess sugar can make dehydration worse.

Offer Sports Drinks Sparingly

If your kids complain about the plain taste of water, consider giving them some sports drinks in place of water from time to time. Sports drinks are designed to hydrate, and are packed with things an active body needs, in addition to more than a few things it doesn’t. They replace lost electrolytes and other essentials that leave the body when exercising, playing or running around. They give your kids something different to enjoy, too, so that they don’t get sick of staying hydrated. Unfortunately, they’re also packed with added sugars, so you don’t want to rely solely on these drinks.

Dress for the Weather

Be sure to dress your kids appropriately for the weather. Light, loose clothes are best for hot days. Do not load them down with layers. Also, be sure they remain in dry clothing for the best results when it comes to keeping hydrated.

Know the Signs of Dehydration

There are signs you should watch for when it comes to juvenile dehydration. If your children show any of these symptoms, take action immediately.

Decreased frequency of urination is one sign of dehydration. A lack of bathroom breaks often indicates that a little one’s hydration level is relatively low. If your child complains of a dry mouth or tongue, this can also indicate dehydration. Your kids probably still need a nap, but if they sleep longer than usual or are sleepy more frequently, this is a severe sign of dehydration and you might consider seeking medical help. Irritability is another sign you should attend to in many cases. Crankiness is normal, but an unusual amount of irritability could be serious.

What to Do If Your Kids Do Get Dehydrated

Step one is don’t panic. If you panic, you’ll send your kids into a panic, and that’s never a good idea. Start off by giving them water to drink, but don’t let them chug it down greedily. Even if they are horribly thirsty, chugging the water is not a good thing. Their bodies will not be able to absorb that water quickly enough, and it may make them even sicker. If conditions do not begin to improve, seek medical attention, but again, be sure you don’t panic.

Dehydration can be horribly dangerous, but it’s a controllable and avoidable situation. Be sure your kids are getting the right amount of water and are getting the proper amount of shading throughout the day. Don’t let them stay outside all day, despite the temptation of letting them run wild and free.

By Marcia Hall

Creativity in a child gives him more than just the ability to play pretend or be artistic, it also leads a child to think and reason for himself.  Having a well-tuned imagination will give your child an advantage when he enters the adult world. When he can look at an issue from many points of view and imagine several solutions he will be an asset in any career he chooses.  Here are a few ways to help encourage creativity and abstract thinking in your child.

Let your child be bored from time to time.  If children are not too busy with their extracurricular activities these days, they are usually in front of some type of screen.  There is little to no imaginary thought in TV, video games and computer games.  When your child whines to you that he is has nothing to do, tell him that you are confident he will find something interesting to do and leave it at that.  Let him come up with the activity.

Be okay with messes and mistakes.  Creativity requires trial and error.  Trial and error sometimes means messes, and at times it creates mistakes.  It can be very difficult for parents to accept that in order for their child to learn to think outside the box, he will have to first make a giant mess of that box.  There is no reason your child cannot help you clean the mess up or fix whatever might be broken, but by making mistakes your child will learn a lot.

Give your child warning when transitions are coming.  For a truly creative child who is mostly in his own world, transitions can be challenging to say the least.  You can assist your child in making these transitions by giving him several warnings when he is going to be required to participate in family events or go somewhere.  Giving him a clear schedule with plenty of “play” time can help a child that does not tend to be creative to let loose and find his creativity.

There are no dumb comments or questions.  The quickest way to stop a creative child in his tracks is to say or act as if the things he observes or the questions he asks are silly.  A child whose thoughts are creatively inquisitive should be encouraged.

Encourage your child to come up with the answers on her own.  As your imaginative child bombards you with question after question, it is important not just to answer his questions, but to encourage him to look for the answers on his own.  Responding to him with your own questions can be a great way to accomplish this.  “What do you think a few possibilities would be?”  “How do you think you could find the answer to that question?” These are two great responses.  When your child is younger, you can help him find the answers in books and online.  As he grows, he should be encouraged to find the answers on his own.

Celebrate your child’s individual characteristics.  Siblings can often get lumped together, especially multiples or siblings with similar personalities.  To grow creativity, parents need to recognize and praise their children for the individual talents that make them unique.

Suggest rather than tell the child how to play.  Toys these days seem to have a “right” way to play them, but a creative child will take that toy and make something new out of it.  Parents that want to encourage this process will need to learn to be okay with pieces of toys being out of place and used for other means.  Telling a child that he is playing “wrong” will stop the imagination process in its tracks.

Get down and make believe with your child.  The most important way to build any characteristic or habit in a child is to do it with him.  If you want your child to learn to be creative, you have to first show that tendency.  This can scare a lot of parents who don’t consider themselves to be very good at using their imagination, and some parents might even feel silly playing “pretend” with their child.  However, it is possibly the most important way you can help your child learn to be creative on his own.

Parenting a truly creative child is a high duty. Whether your child is creative artistically, loves to pretend or is just really good at thinking outside the box, letting him complete a project to see how it will end is very important.  It can be difficult, but watching him discover the world through the process is priceless.

By Marcia Hall

Whether it’s school starting early, having a hectic work schedule, trying to get the kids to afterschool activities or constantly being on the go on the weekends, it can be difficult to instill healthy eating habits in your children.  Because of this, drive-thru’s and convenience stores can end up being a mom’s best friend.  However, feeding your children meals and snacks from these places sends a strong, unhealthy and sometimes dangerous message.

Commit to three meals at home together a week.  The importance of eating meals together as a family cannot be underestimated.  Having dinner at the table together helps build bonds that are centered on the very essence of family.  Children naturally want to be with their family, and they will have positive memories of this experience. When you partner this family meal with healthy food choices, your child will be more likely to continue to make healthy choices because it subconsciously reminds her of the family connection.

Try new foods together as a family.  Young children are notoriously picky eaters.  They tend to find a food they enjoy and want nothing else.  They frequently refuse to eat foods that look, smell or feel different than what they are used to.  Even mac and cheese made from a different box can cause a child to run screaming. To help curtail this pickiness, it is important to experiment with new foods as a family.  Remember that it can take a child several months to get used to a new food.  If it is a particularly offensive food, start with just putting a portion on his plate every day for a week.  Next, you can encourage her to feel it with her fingers and even with her tongue when she is comfortable.  This does not mean she has to swallow it, she just needs to put it in her mouth every day for a week so she can get used to the texture.  Slowly she will begin to get more comfortable with it, and eventually you can ask her to swallow one bite.  Children with high sensitivities to new foods may take up to a month before they’re comfortable trying the food, but other children will learn to eat it after a few days.  The important thing is that you eat that new food right alongside your child.

All family members eat the same thing.  Avoid making special meals for your child if she does not like what she has.  You can offer some extra of what she likes after she has tried the disliked food, but don’t make her mac and cheese just because you know she does not like meatloaf.

Prepare ahead of time for the whole week.   It is pretty easy to pre-make a lot of foods, from sandwiches and scrambled eggs to cut up veggies and baggies of grapes.  If you have time on the weekend, assemble sandwiches that your child can take for lunch for the whole week and keep them in the fridge so you can just grab them in the morning and go.  You can portion out some cut up veggies and fruit in bags too so they’re easily accessible in the mornings.  You can even bake scrambled eggs ahead of time; this way your children can have a healthy breakfast, even on school days when time is limited.  Bake them in muffin tins for the whole week and then freeze them.  In the morning, microwave them for a minute or two, add a banana and you have a healthy school morning breakfast!

Invest in on-the-go containers and foods. There is nothing wrong with needing to eat on the go. The extra 10 minutes it might save you in the morning or after school can make a huge difference.  The problem is that “on-the-go” usually means fast food.  This can be avoided by investing in containers and healthy foods that travel well.

Do not neglect eating a healthy breakfast.  For many adults and children, breakfast is an afterthought.  Most of the time, people aren’t really that hungry when they have to wake up early in the morning.  However, neglecting this meal has effects that last throughout the day.  A child’s breakfast often consists of high carbohydrate cereals or sugary toaster meals with little to no protein.  This causes a spike of energy to get out the door, but also causes blood sugar to drop quickly 30 minutes into the school day.  Even young children do not have snack time until about an hour and half into class, so they are likely attempting to learn while their body and brain are hungry for more nourishment.  This will often cause your child to be sluggish, easily distracted and unable to listen well.  It might also cause her to reach for higher carb, sugary foods to satisfy her until lunch.  Then at lunch she is more likely to start with the carbohydrate in the meal, and the cycle goes on and one.  Do your children a favor and make a healthy protein filled breakfast a priority.  You will be amazed at the difference in her behavior and her focus, all from eating a healthy meal at the beginning of the day.

Children will always gravitate toward sweet and salty treats.  However, the more their parents model what healthy eating looks like, the more likely they will only crave those treats once in a while.

By Marcia Hall

Parenting is supposed to be about being in charge of the family, having control and being the wise adult is any situation.  For that reason, a lot of parents feel that apologizing sends a message of weakness and ineffectiveness to their children.  However, there are some really great arguments for why parents should say they are sorry to their child when the parent has done something wrong.

1. It helps the child understand what it means to be “sorry.” Unfortunately, these days the word “sorry” is often misused in our world.  Adults rarely say it to other adults, but frequently force their children to say it.  This situation should be changed.  When parents step up and admit fault to a child it helps the child understand from another perspective what it means to feel remorse for an action. The person that caused her pain now feels bad about what he did and is coming to her to ask for forgiveness. This shifts the focus from “I have to say these words” to “I should feel this way.”
2. It models healthy lifelong behaviors to your children.  When parents require their child to say “sorry” for what she has done, the parents real desire is that she will eventually say “sorry” for wrong actions, even when mom or dad is not around. However, the only way to help your child develop a desire to apologize on her own is to create an atmosphere of remorse in your home.  When parents apologize for their slips, large and small, this environment begins to form.
3. It helps your child to see you as the imperfect person that you are.  Your child is going to mess up and make mistakes. This is not because she is a bad child, but because she is human and it is our human nature to mess up from time to time.  When parents show their humanity by admitting their guilt to their child and requesting the child’s forgiveness, it helps the child to see that making mistakes is a part of life and is nothing to be afraid of or even ashamed of.  This will help his self-image to be founded in this truth.  “Mistakes happen, but you can mend broken relationships or fix problems though a sincere apology and move forward trying to do better next time.”
4. It connects the parent and child together.  Nothing separates a relationship more than when you hurt another person with words or actions.  A yell here and a push there can really add up.  Certainly, there are times when parents have to make choices in order to protect the child.  It is likely that the child will be hurt by some of these decisions, words and actions.  This may not be the best time to apologize to your child.  Validation of the child’s hurt and actions of love are what is needed in these times.  However, when a parent steps over the line, forgets to stop and listen to the child’s point of view, yells without thinking it through or hurts the child out of anger, the parent is in the wrong.  When that happens, a connection with the child is broken.  It is then up to the parent to rebuild and repair that relationship though words and actions.

Saying “sorry” to your child does not make you any less of a parent in your relationship with your child.  It may take some of the power you have over her away.  However, the goal of parenting is not to dominate every situation that children are in, but to guide, direct and be an example of the right way to interact with others.

When your child is sick, you’re naturally focused on helping her get better and managing the implications of an illness. For most parents, the doctors and nurses in charge of your child’s medical care are seen as steadfast allies. When medical care goes wrong or school administrators aren’t willing to work with your child during an extended absence, you’ll be forced to act not only as a caregiver and comforter for your child, but also an advocate for her.

Trust Your Own Instincts

As a parent and the person who spends the most time with your child, you’re in the perfect position to recognize the difference between a minor complaint and a real illness. Full waiting rooms, high overhead and tight schedules can motivate your child’s pediatrician to examine and diagnose her as quickly as possible, which could lead to the dismissal of a real ailment as a minor one. If your instincts are telling you that there’s more to your child’s illness than the doctor is acknowledging, you need to have the confidence to challenge the pediatrician’s opinion. It’s entirely possible to approach her with your concerns in a polite and respectful manner, and it’s something you should absolutely do if you feel that your child isn’t getting the care she needs.

Don’t Be Afraid to Ask Questions

A brusque pediatrician that projects a rushed, harried air may not be the easiest person to approach with questions, but it’s important for parents to realize that they’re well within their rights to ask their pediatrician questions. If you don’t understand a prescribed treatment, aren’t sure of what your pediatrician is diagnosing your child with or simply don’t understand his instructions for the child’s care, you’ll need to question him further on those subjects. Regardless of how tight your pediatrician’s schedule is, he should make time to address the questions and concerns of worried parents.

If Necessary, Seek a Second Opinion

The faith that many parents place in their pediatrician leads them to follow her advice without question, but it’s important to remember that your pediatrician is human and, as such, is completely fallible. Not only is it okay to seek a second opinion if you don’t feel that your child’s diagnosis is correct, it’s essential. Your child’s health should be your primary concern, and it’s important to remember that even a pediatrician with his best interests at heart could miss subtle signs or indicators of an illness. Before you accept a diagnosis of a common cold or minor ailment when you suspect something more serious, consider getting a second opinion.

Work With School Administrators

Some school districts are great when it comes to working with chronically-ill children and have plenty of programs in place to ensure that those kids don’t fall behind in their studies while managing the symptoms of their illness. Others have very rigid regulations, aren’t interested in working to meet your child’s needs and will find any way possible to absolve themselves from the responsibility of caring for your chronically-ill child’s educational needs. In such cases, it’s important that you act as an advocate for him. Learn the laws in your state, as well as the requirements of public schools under Federal law in regard to chronically-ill or special-needs children. Remember the old adage about catching flies with honey, and maintain your composure when you’re discussing the matter with recalcitrant school administrators. The last thing you want is for your grievances to be dismissed due to your actions, so maintain a respectful and firm attitude when confronting teachers, principals and other administrators.

Keep Exhaustive Records

From the doctor’s office to the principal’s office, the most effective weapon in your arsenal when it comes to advocating for your sick child are well-maintained and exhaustive records. Keep up with every episode of an illness, every missed day of school and every doctor’s excuse so that all of your bases are covered.

Acting as an advocate for your sick child can feel like a full-time job sometimes, but it’s important that you remember what you’re fighting for. Your child needs quality healthcare and the attention of his educators, but he also needs the comfort and reassurance of a parent that loves him. Dealing with an illness can be a scary thing for a child, and it’s easy for parents to become so wrapped up in their fight with the healthcare and education systems that they forget how much affection and comfort their ill child needs.

By Marcia Hall

When you first become a parent, you look at your tiny baby and think there is no way you could ever get angry or yell at this beautiful tiny creature.  But before long that small baby grows and you find that there are more days where you are frustrated with him than you would like.  When you find yourself in those moments of utter exasperation, here are 10 things that can help prevent you from yelling at him.

1. Set clear boundaries.  When rules are not clear in the house, children have a really hard time following them.  If you have said in passing several times, “Take off your shoes when they are wet,” you may assume that your child has heard you and will remember that.  So when it rains and he walks on your clean floor with wet muddy shoes you get upset because you “told” him not to  a dozen times.  However, to a child this is a vague and ambiguous rule.  By setting more concrete rules, you help your child understand what is expected of him.  Then he will be more likely to remember the rule.
2. Set simple consequences.  Sometimes parents threaten consequences that they themselves do not want to follow through on.  If you tell your child if he does not clean up his room by 5PM he will not get to go to get to go to his friend’s house, then you better be okay with him not going to his friend’s house.  If you are threatening that consequence because you know going to his friend’s house important to him, but had made your own plans, you are more likely to yell at him when he is being slow to clean his room.  However, if you set a consequence that you can live with and is not complicated, you will have a much easier time enforcing that consequence without yelling and getting upset at your child.
3. Speak to your child on his level.  If your child is young, it can be intimidating to hear you standing above him giving commands.  There is a good chance that a child of just about any age will not even fully hear you if you are not face to face with him.  Getting down on his level might even mean that you make sure that you use words that you know he understands. If a child is given instructions and he does not fully understand, remember or comprehend them, how can he follow them?  When this happens it is not the fault of the child for not hearing, but the fault of the parent for not speaking in a way he can understand.
4. Be sure your child understands what you are asking of him.  After you clearly tell a child what you expect of him, you need to confirm with him that he fully understands what you just said.  You can do so by asking a simple question of, “I want to make sure we understand each other.  What am I asking of you?”
5. Respond every time a rule is broken.  It can be very difficult to stop what you are doing to deal with your child every time a rule is broken.  However, the longer you let a set rule be broken, the more your child will continue to do the offense.  You will then have a breaking point where you will come running to the situation.  At this point, you will be frustrated and less likely to be able to contain that anger.
6. Remind your child only ONE time of the rule.  Often, parents think they are doing their child a favor by giving two, three or more chances to make a broken rule right.  This does nothing but lead to confusion from the child and frustration from the parents.  Each time you return to the child to remind him of the broken rule and let it slide, you get more and more frustrated, which leads to you finding yourself at the end of your patience.  Your child sees these repeated empty warnings and it confuses him.  He has no way of knowing when you are serious about the rule and when you will let it go.  By holding yourself to the ONE reminder only, you avoid building your frustration and you help your child understand that you mean what you say.
7. Immediately deliver the consequence. Once that rule has been clearly set, he knows the consequence for his choice and has been given one warning. If he breaks the rule again, the consequence must be enforced.  When you are able to consistently follow through on what you said you would do, it makes the situation less emotional and therefore helps you to keep your cool.
8. Ask him to remind you when you yell at him.  Some parents do not fully understand the way their voice sounds to their child.  If yelling is a habit that you are serious about breaking, you can give your child permission to inform you when he feels you are yelling at him.  This can seem unwise, because no parent wants their child to “talk back” to them.  However, it can work if some ground rules are put in place.  The child must use a phrase agreed upon like, “Mom, it makes me sad when you yell at me.”  You will also have to discuss the difference between raising your voice and yelling.  There are times that it can be appropriate to raise your voice at a child.  However, parents also need to realize that what may seem like a slightly raised voice to you can sound incredibly scary to your child.
9. Respond kindly when he yells at you.  It can be very difficult to hear your child scream at you and not respond in a similar manner.  However, responding with equal or greater volume does not help the child learn not to yell and it does not help you avoid yelling either.  Instead, when your child yells at you, say to him, “When you talk to me like that it seems as if you do not care about me.  Please talk to me like I am someone you love.”
10. Take a “parent” time out.  It’s not unusual to send a child out of the room when he yells in order to give the child space to calm down and regroup.  Parents often need this as well.  Leaving the room and separating yourself from the situation for a short time can help you gain clarity to deal with the issue in a more calm way.  This also provides an excellent example for your child when he gets angry.

It may be impossible for the average parent to never yell at their child.  However, it is possible to make the event infrequent.  These steps will not only help you avoid yelling at your child, but they will also help your child follow the rules more consistently.

When you hire a domestic worker, which includes private childcare providers, you’re required by law to provide them with a W-2 form each year showing that Social Security, Medicare and the proper income taxes have been withheld. IRS estimates regarding federal income tax law compliance among nannies and their employers is very low, with the majority of employers and nannies working under an “off the books” arrangement. Because the compliance rate is so notoriously low, some employers feel that the risk of being discovered is also relatively low and opt for the perceived savings that come with skipping compliance altogether. If you’re considering an under the table arrangement that will leave your nanny with no W-2 at the beginning of the year, there are some dire consequences you’ll want to take into consideration first.

Tax Fraud Charges

The worst case scenario nanny employers could face if their non-compliance is discovered involves criminal charges, though it’s not necessarily the norm. In most cases, payment of the back taxes, penalties for non-compliance and interest is enough to hold off the prospect of jail time. The government does have the right, however, to pursue those charges. Even if the chances of imprisonment are relatively slim, it’s wise to ask yourself if even the faintest chance of a jail sentence is worth saving a comparatively small amount of money.

Lack of Workers’ Compensation Coverage

In order to obtain a workers’ compensation policy to protect you from financial liability should your nanny be injured on the job, you’ll have to be registered with the IRS as an employer. Many employers are under the misconception that their homeowners’ insurance policy will cover any injury that occurs on their property, but this is almost never the case when it comes to domestic employees. The financial implications of a single lawsuit for an uninsured accident can be devastating, and can alert the authorities to your lack of legal tax compliance.

Potential Professional Risks

More than one promising, high-profile political career has been derailed by the discovery of illegal hiring practices and failure to pay the proper taxes for a nanny. Whether you have aspirations of running for political office or furthering a civilian career, your reputation could be immediately and irrevocably ruined by allegations of illegal hiring practices

Social Security and Unemployment Benefits

Nannies will inevitably find themselves without work at some point in their careers. Their charges grow up, families’ financial circumstances change and they even become incapable of working full time as they get older. A career of working under the table leaves your nanny with no Social Security benefits to draw from or unemployment benefits to utilize when she reaches the appropriate age. Some will still choose to file for unemployment benefits after the loss of a post, especially if there’s bad blood between her and the employers she’s left behind. In those situations, you’ll inevitably be found out.

You Can Be Held Liable at Any Time

Even years after the fact, you can be held liable for tax evasion for failing to pay nanny employment taxes. Because the statute of limitations never runs out for tax evasion, you’re never truly out of the woods. The prospect of serious criminal charges and exorbitantly steep financial penalties will never fade away, so you may find that you’re never able to relax for worry that your illegal activity will be discovered.

A 1099 Won’t Cut It

It’s not uncommon for nanny employers to feel that they’re circumventing complex nanny tax laws by deeming their domestic employee an independent contractor, and choosing to issue a 1099 instead of a W-2. The Internal Revenue Service has declared that domestic workers are almost always considered employees, not independent contractors. You could still face penalties for choosing to issue a 1099, even if you’re trying to be nominally compliant.

Your Nanny Could File Anyway

Some nannies readily accept an under the table arrangement, but those that are serious about pursuing a legitimate career in private childcare may refuse. Your nanny could still file her taxes with a Form 4825 that allows her to file without a W-2 form. The process is extremely complicated, but still possible, and could create a world of legal and financial trouble for her employers. Choosing not to provide a W-2 after withholding the appropriate taxes doesn’t mean that your nanny won’t file, only that you’ll be left holding the proverbial bag should she choose to do so.